Monday, Q-F-1 STARTO!!

Got up at a freaking 730am and prepared and took cab and reached MDC by 9am. To be honest, I was in a totally sian mood for obvious reasons. I wasn't happy with this collaboration to begin with or perhaps the root of the problem was SOMETHING or SOMEONE else...

Everyone were preparing their own stuffs. I brought along a big suitcase containing laptop, 2 big bottles of water and full of food and jacket cos we were told the theatre would be cold. So I stuffed it all inside a suitcase and brought it along with me so that I don't have to physically carry them, just dragging them along will do. But S1 would have to say things like, "Ppl play band then will need suitcase to bring heavy equipments, we're not band what!"

As if being mocked once isn't enough, Someone has to go around telling other contestant, "Eh! You know what's inside En En's suitcase? All food!" Do I need you to go around telling ppl why I brought. What business is it of yours what I bring or what I bring to do with it?

That made me even more sian... I had already endured enough and now you give me these. TMD! All the waiting aggravated my mood even. While the 3 of them kept hanging out together, I was all alone in the theatre doing my school work with my laptop. 3 hours passed by very soon and I was still fucking waiting. I brought along my charger but obviously I couldn't be away to plug into available sockets outside.

Group by group went up on stage to do sound check and running through the song and making adjustment to whatever equipments or sound system. The bands went up to test while the vocal/singing groups were the lasts to test. Frankly speaking, while I was up on stage... I can't hear anything except very far/faint/luan mix of our voices. I mean I can hear it... but it's not like 'hearing yourself speak' kind. I couldn't hear anything clearly... I just based on how I sing everytime.

I guess when you hear singers zao sia on stage, it is very likely and almost 100% they can't hear themselves and their music sense isn't strong enough to get it right just by vibration of throat or anything. Which is why I have a loud voice... even sometimes I have my ears plugs with earphones and I sing along to the tune, I make sure my voice is loud enough for my own hearing (with ear plugs still inside ears). That is why I 'train' my voice to be stereo enough on normal speaking circumstances. Ok I think it's quite technical explaination...

Anyhow, I thought we did horribly during the 3 sound checks mainly cos we still haven't gotten used to the sounds we're getting. Everything was very unsure. But the soundmen and other contestants who heard us said we sounded ok. Well, you won't know whether they're trying to sound diplomatic or really thought we sounded ok or they probably also couldn't tell what's ok what's not ok. =X

There was no time for lunch cos time was pretty right for 8 groups to get ready. We got changed and did make up at 1pm.

Sneak some zi pai in the toilet.

We went back to the theatre and waited for our turn to rehearse again. Sang 3 times for camera shots until 330 and we had a break until 415 where Das K & PF came in and we rehearsed the full sequence from B1 all the way to till the end and also the result show too...

A group pic taken by Das K.


At 615pm, we were standing by backstage and I got sms from Dearie & my family that they were reaching soon. I was happy & nervous that I knew my family would be watching.

While hanging around backstage, there were of course phototaking session behind.


We decided to act bo liao. And then FZ came long and joined....


And with DFC.


Wah biang, the make up, believe me, is damn thick.

So the LIVE show started at 8pm... Das & PF were announce for all the groups to get up. I saw my family & friends immediately, my sisters were waving the banner excitedly.. I felt rather ji dong when I saw Mian's sms "Da jia, jia you jia you! Don't look at those ants surrounding ur feet! Look at us! Muz 深情 ok!"... Many thanks to JW, YJ, YC for coming down.

Photos credits belonged to: Neng, XP, JW, PP's friend.


The opening where everyone gathered on stage.

Close up of us.

I felt that night I kept hunching my back.

We were the 4th group to perform and when it was our turn, we were standing by on stage. Frankly speaking, the seemed smaller than NTU's Impressario or TQ. Just that this show is showing on national TV. I suppose not a lot of ppl watch this?

The 2:15 minute of XQG.

The diamond formation...


FAT FAT FAT arms... gosh~ I look bloated on TV, I look bloated in pictures.

Awaiting for judges comments

Probably hearing some positive remarks, hence the smile.


The DUH look coming out soon...

Switching into stern looks... Probably negative remarks ba.



Burst into smiles when judges mentioned about PP's dressing that he thought PP is a female based on the 2 red 2 blue dressing.

A TV screen shot I found online


When the last group had finished, we went back up on stage where the hosts announce the top 3 and it was the end. Everyone would be awaiting for result show. My family & friends would be staying back to watch the result show. I haven't eaten anything since whole day so I went backstage to have my bento.

Ate until halfway, heard from other contestants that they'd be going to the audience to look for their friends. So ZBL also went to the audience. I was so happy to see my family, Dearie & friends who came. My Papa Mama being so supportive made me very gan dong...

Took pics with my friends....


White makes one FAT FAT FAT!! I looked so damn fat...arrrrgghhh.

Sneaked a pic with my fair Dearie


PP's colleagues also very supportive! They wore Tshirts printed with alphabets! Took some group pics with them too.



Then the stupid AP (Assistant Producer) Mr NR Tan kept rushing us off. I didn't get the chance to take pics with my parents & sisters. Neng was tired and I saw her dozing off in the audience seat. Sigh... Off backstage we went...

And now, backstage frenzy begins.

Purpose of putting this pic is to show the very nice skin complexion of the lead singer of YSJ.

My turn! With the tallest & shortest member of YSJ.

I already so fat liao still use low angle... gosh!

With PP & PGY

I like the color combi! White/Yellow & White/Turqoise.

And then PGY's Vienne & I wanted to take pics with the tall ones (YSJ). Pose until nice nice already then suddenly...

真的是杀风景。。。。-_-" Like what WM will tell his neice Chloe "Monster come liao!"

Ok, balek pose again.

But like very dark and covered Mr Tallie.

Ok, posing as 'fan girls' taking pics with ou xiangs! LOL!


And then PGY wanted to take pics with YSJ too! I tell you ah.. YSJ majiam superstar at backstage, EVERYONE (contestants) wants to take pics with them. All they did whole time backstage was stand there and ppl will come by and ask to take pics... LOL!

At around 1030pm, we were standing by for result show and we were actually the first group to get through to the next round. I was... feeling neutral. Got chance to sing again of course it's good, but... the moment I heard, "Ok! Next song we must spend more time perfecting it ok?" I was immediately sian again.... That would mean having to go through the whole cycle again & again...

After the show ended, I watched as my family & friends got up from their seats. I watched till they left the theatre and 心里有一阵难过. 如果可以的话，我也想和你们一起离开，离开这恐怖的舞台.

Even as the show ended, we still gotta present the song for the next QF to Mr B Wong. Luckily for us, we were the first group to present and we could go home immediately... took the cab and went home, having mixed feelings... and recalling back the looks on my parents face and watching how excited my sisters as they cheered for me...

I love you Papa, Mama, Neng & Mian... Dearie was home waiting for me too. Chatted about the whole event together, had some laughters and it was getting late, time for them to sleep as they got work & school the next day...

Tuesday, nuah the whole day at home with Dearie.

Luckily I'm a student who doesn't have to go to school everyday. I wonder how the 3 is able to handle while working the next day after a long day on Monday. I only got up at 3pm and had lunch while continuing watching Fated to Love You. I don't like the Xinyi after she left for Shanghai and got prettier. She tried to change herself during these 2 years, hoping to forget Ji Cunxi but fate let them both meet and has to work together on a project...

I didn't like the way she treated Cunxi... all of a sudden, she seemed like some kinda self-centered bimbo thinking now that she had gotten prettier and more confident, she could get her way. I mean ya la, Cunxi hurt her before and was insensitive to her feelings but... hmm... very irritating...

Continued nuahing until 9pm and had dinner while watching TV. He had to work the next morning, hence I saw him to the bus stop at 11pm. We had ice cream while waiting for the bus but after eating ice cream he said he was too tired to take the long bus journey home and took a cab.

I went around blogsearch of what people commented about the episode yesterday and also thought about what Pris & Dearie said about my family...

I looked through Pris' sms, "It was nice for your entire family to turn up to support u last night. Plus of cos your sisters were so sweet doing the banner! Without this competition, don't think u'd ever see your parents and sisters waving cards to support their dear daughter and sis! I could see the big grin on your dad's face. I'm touched and I am very sure they were very proud of u. I could see it on their beaming faces. U were the only one among us whose entire family went to watch and support. So think of these whenever u feel sian."

I remembered Xiang was saying my parents kept asking him to vote for us last night. He said my parents were very happy and clapped and cheered loudly for me...

一想到这些画面，就觉得鼻子酸酸的，眼睛湿湿的。

从小到大，我一直说过我从来都没有坐过什么让家人觉得骄傲的事。
我也没有机会看到他们骄傲的目光，
而是透过别人的眼睛，别人的嘴巴而得知道的。

阿翔说，爸爸妈妈是很疼爱我的，
昨天晚上是一个非常好地证明。
妈妈为我准备便当，凉茶，好吃的好喝的，对身体有益的。
爸爸花钱打电话，给我钱买比赛需要的。

都几岁的人了，还得靠父母这样细心照顾，疼爱。
忽然之间，我好想为父母做很多很多。。。。

谢谢爸爸妈妈。。。。

Wednesday, got up at 11 and finished the proposal that was due and went to school to print it out before presenting it to Jojo.

Everything was done at 415am and had some time to kill before going over to TMC for practice. Had arranged to meet up with Huihui where she passed me the paycheck I had helped her back in Apr. I had dinner alone at Swis Ling (this zi cha kopitiam I used to frequent with Hai Die gals at Outram there) before killing time inside TMC while waiting for the others.

As usual, there is always heated exchange of opinions of doing something different for the sake of being different.

1. "不然我们在这里加 beatbox 啦？"
It was a draw but you kept insisting in wanting to put it. It was until we seek Goddess' opnions who mentioned it wasn't feasible then you kept quiet about it.

2. "下一首歌的 arrangement，我有想找人 arrange. 他的 rate 因该差不多 $150-200. 我觉得要做就要做得好。"
If I'm going to spend the money for arrangement knowing we'd get kicked out sooner or later, I'd rather invest it on clothes or save it for cab transport. Don't give the face! What makes you decide where I'm spending my money on?

3. "为什么你要在这里 wu oh oh?"
Poopee feels that it will aid him if he added the wu oh oh. What difference does it make whether it's there or not? Why did we spend so much time just to decide whether it's suitable or not? If was until I approach P Tan's opnions again and say if it makes a difference and he said, "Like that only ah? Wu oh oh need so much time to settle meh? I think have or don't have doesn't matter what."

Do we really have to go through mouths of all laoshis for their final verdicts, immediate & instant responses to get things working faster? Do we count ourselve lucky if there happen to be any laoshis around to comment anything? Then what if there aren't any laoshis avaible? Then it's going to be 没完没了 right? Sigh... 每次口口声声说“没有逼”，那那个态度和语气是什么？

Ended up tu until 1245am then able to leave. The sharing of cab always makes me reach home later than supposed to. Outram>Redhill>Ghim Moh>Sunset Way>Jurong.

Got home and saw Poopee online and pssst him. Asked him if he was enthu about the whole thing.

结果我俩感同身受。
那天在台上的兴奋都是装出来了。
对于过关，我们一点也不兴奋。
We know we'd be facing a vicious cycle:

discussions > disagreements > conflicts > doing things unwillingly to resolve > buay song accumulates

It's very sian. Make that extremely.
Poopee said, "I wish some of us have better tempers."
I said, "I wish someone was more understanding."

Come on la, it's not like we're full-time performers tan jiak outside this competition. We're also not like the others who are already & qualified music teacher/instructors or jobless, graduated and not studying.. eng eng cheng cheng... If anyone were to be blatant, it'd obvious that bands will stay. No matter how hard we try will also face elimination sooner or later.

有时候，很多事情都是可以商量的。
但是，每逢有什么决定要做的时候，我们却没有办法妥协。
是的，每个人都会有不同的想法，没错。
可是需要每次都把‘captain'seh 拿出来吗？
为什么每次都养弄到没有商量的余地的？

Sigh... Explained so much also don't know if anyone understand what I'm going through, if YOU understand what WE are going through.

Thursday, 最近发掘时间过得真快。转眼2008年的前半年就这样过了。而7月份快来临了。也就是说下个表演又要逼近了。。。

Supposed to be doing work but whole day nuah and watch drama.... oh mo

Friday, got up and continued project that I was supposed to hand it at the very last minute.

Went to school slightly earlier to complete as much as I can. Luckily presentation was alright since I was the last to present. I killed time at the school library until 7pm and took 961 to TMC.

There were ppl who occupied the sofa so I kill time using my laptop from 715 to 9pm until XP & Poopee arrived. Shuhui arrived at 930 cos she came from attending a wedding. I basically nuahed for more than 2 hours.... Even though everyone came but it wasn't productive cos S1 had to answer calls and doing PR and talking lots... PP & I sighed and stoned inside one of the rooms until Pris arrived then we started doing costumes for the next song...

Sometimes I really feel sorry for Pris for having to come over and watch us waste time and we ended up doing nothing productive. Sorry... just that I ALWAYS have Friday Blues cos my energy is usually used up on this day... perhaps it was the same for Pris as well.

The unproductive session only ended at 145am when I saw Pris nodding away. We'd always share cab and I'm always the last one to arrive home. TMD SBS~~~

Saturday, got up at 1130 and prepared myself to go MDC to meet B Wong.

He said since my voice was the loudest so might as well I lead. But also commented my vocal & body expression don't match. I tend to be stiff which he said I cannot let ppl know I'm inconfident & scared. Sigh... ok, I'll try to work on this la. Not the first time I'm hearing.

The producers E & MX had to shoot us for the VT intro of the next QF so they actually suggested that we appointed a lead singer so that audience will be able to remember. Although we kept insisting "All 4 can sing" but audience will not be able to remember all 4. So it has to be somebody recognisable and producers were suggesting let me be lead. But I don't have any qualities that says 'lead'.

After meeting B Wong, went over to TPY and took train to Novena and met up with Dearie for hair cut appointment. Went to trim my hair. Back some period, I always had bangs and then I wanted to have side parting like those female Korean leads but I realised I couldn't carry off that classy look, so I figure bangs suit me more.

Sunday, got up at 1130 and head to IMM to treat my family.

Was really very touched by my family's supportiveness and wanted to give them a lunch treat since I haven't exactly paid or done anything for the family excepting bring them trouble.

Pics of 3 sisters on the car on the way to IMM.

Ok, didn't mean to scare you all off with how I look but I'm usually more myself & sampat when I'm with my family! LOL!

Brought them to Wang Jiao. Dad was astronished by the long queue but I assured him the food is definitely worth it so we queued up for a table and made our orders.

Orders came and my sisters were so fascinated. Suddenly I felt sad/bad that my sisters were unable to eat such hao liao before...


Delicious wanton noodles!

My mom hardly likes to take pics.



Chocolate fudge ice cream on baked toast! Another nice one!!!


Neng ready to dip in!


This pork floss fried rice is nice too!! OMG~

We were imersed into the food to take more pics. After the sumptous dinner, mom & sisters went to buy rice cooker which dad & I went to shop for new pair of sports shoes for him. Went to a few sports shops and finally found a nice Reebok pair and he wore it immediately and threw the old one right there! Hehe! I paid for the pair of shoes for Papa also... I felt happy paying for my family actually... lol!

The whole family then shopped at Best Denki then at Giants! Ahh...I love my family! hehe... Went home and nuah for awhile and caught the repeat telecast for QF1. I went jogging in the evening without my sisters and after coming home, I realised my laptop auto shut off and I kena the windows detected a serious error... alamak...

Sunday Nights are Drama Nights. I watched Episode 10 of Absolutely Boyfriend and Episode 16 of Fated to Love You.