Well, when I started seeing Mr Z, I knew this was bound to happen which was why during the past years of being together, we both always get upset and 闹翻 over this. Ok, I am the one who gets upset but he doesn't get why I'm upset which just makes me ARGH... and the whole thing is just very sian to the extend that nothing be done about it.


I used to read about this article Japanese Women VS Chinese Women that left me a deep impression.

日本女子几乎都很孝顺，将婆婆视为自己的母亲。
Japanese women are mostly very filial, seeing their MIL as their own mother.

中国籍的女人大多巴不得自己的婆婆快点挂掉。
Most Chinese women are all too eager for the MIL to quickly die.

I'm pretty sure there are certain truth to it as depicted in dramas. Perhaps you even have seen real life examples before. It's a vicious cycle why DILs react these way cos of dictative MILs or MILs who think so extremely highly of her son or not bear to let go or is the type who like to vie attention for her son.

It's after being with Mr Z that I always wonder all the aunties who bore sons got so much reasons to be so damn fucking haolian anot? What? Son is more difficult to bear and deliver out than daughters huh? Your son most precious and other ppl daughters are shit huh?

I wouldn't say I'm suffering la, cos unlike olden days, I didn't have to be maid/slave to do their household chores etc. But it's just very sian cos she's damn good at using aggressive-passive. I don't know, and she probably don't care that she cause a lot of tension & unhappiness in the family.

When Dasao & ZY were dating, she was a lovely, bubbly girl who loves to smile. I'm not saying ZY doesn't treat her well. On the surface, both of them still seem ok just that... for someone who loves to smile and be excited/enthu about live to be so 沉默寡言, she obviously have bear a lot of unhappiness that she has no one to say and could only swallow it on her own. Because I personally seen MIL complained abt Dasao in front of Xiang & I before. Xiang, being influenced by his mom, would also agree and say things about Dasao.

I would say that Dasao is a very good-natured, kind-hearted lovely lady, she's not the type to talk back but even MIL isn't satisfied with her! SMLJ! All I can observed is ZY loves & dotes on his wife a lot a lot and MIL needs to be jealous over this?

Ok never mind. Next issue: HDB queuing. MIL was offended that Xiang didn't ask her to join in our HDB appointment to choose unit. I was shocked because I thought this was our decision, something that we can decide for ourselves and not having to involve our parents at all? His reason was that ZY involved her so she thought she could also have some say for our future house??

???????? Sorry? Excuse me???? Later, I thought the matter was over and we could all move on until she came to speak to me personally. She said, "I wanted to follow cos I wanted to see. When his bro chosen his unit, I was also asked to follow. So I thought I can follow with you all too."

There is a vast difference of upbringing. They are very closely knitted family, very inclusive, must include everyone and everyone's opinion. On the other hand, I am very stubborn and estranged from my own family. I would always NEVER want my parents to be involved in my life ever. Best is they don't kajiao me at all. But he is different, he enjoys things done for him by his mom - what is this? Refusing to grow up is it? Quite gross u know. I am appalled & horrified....

Anyway, so I replied her genuinely that I am not very comfortable with big groups to which she said, "这样就不对了." I can only hang my head in despair.