Short Talk: I just realised I'd typed SO MUCH/LONG. Warning: Reader's discretion is strongly advised. 
I may not have the worst job, neither do I have one that I feel proud or satisfied with what I'm doing.


I mean, most ppl probably do not love their job and what they're doing. But to make a living, one just doesn't really have a choice as long as it's stable and it pays off your monthly bills. 

Even though my previous jobs were problematic like long hours, owed salary, acting as PA while traveling overseas but there WAS SOME satisfaction though not a lot of it. I may not be appreciated but I was acknowledged and I truly felt some point of fulfillment when I accomplished a project. I enjoyed the meetings/discussion to get my work done right. I liked that the communication with clients were clear and I was given authority to deliver my work. Even if it may not be most ideal but it was through discussions in order for me to FULLY UNDERSTAND what the client wanted in order to proceed to completion. And that was something I hadn't felt since I got here.

Sure, who doesn't wish to have higher paying jobs... I dunno, maybe being paid more, one is 'more willing' to take more shit even if it's really shitty. How shitty is shitty? Different ppl has different tolerance level or threshold so everyone's definition of shitty is different.

I don't need to stand long hours or on the move the whole time like folks at fast food or retail sales.
I don't have a quota to meet.
I don't need to negotiate terms with clients
I don't have to get my hands dirty, drilling or shifting or moving stuff.

So I get to sit down comfortably in an air-con room 8 hours a day and able to get off on the dot and still able to exercise regularly, eat well, sleep well. What's there to complain about, you say?

Some more, since I'm a designer, didn't I already expect that in my line of work, clients will just keep coming back for endless changes till they are satisfied?

Maybe it's my own personal character problem that I don't really like 'my peace to be disrupted', therefore I get irritated & pissed off easily when I have to deal with idiots.

How do you define what's an idiot? Someone who only knows how to use mouth and say a.k.a All Talk No Action.

What are the results when you have to deal with idiots? Nothing.

When no amount of communication can solve or fix anything, it's just a waste of time cos nothing get done cos everybody JUST TALK/SAY which is so damn bloody simple/easy.

It's worse that everybody just wants to do their own thing WITH THEIR OWN STANDARD, then everybody has different impression/expectation then there's no standardising and things always gets nowhere. The process repeats every single time for every project and nothing's really accomplished except producing substandard & shitty end product that I would be embarrassed to be part of it.

Any idea how to improve the process, you ask? Let's just say that I am still figuring that out but I doubt it can be done in near future cos the mindsets of ppl here are pretty fixed. Since I'm thrown in this situation, I can only just be 'bo bian' and try to work around with it.

In private sector when there are costs involved, TIME IS MONEY. Hence, A LOT of effort is put into the planning stage. Ppl should always think about long-term, about sustainability, you want to make the process of maintenance work lesser. Design isn't for short-term only. It has to be workable & sustainable. So the research/planning are vital to make sure things run smoothly so there will not be cock up during the development stages. Makes sense? Cos TIME IS MONEY, there's no money and time to re-do. The requirements must be precise & specific before proceeding.

Over here, ppl don't care shit about planning. A lot is just ideas - SAY ONLY. Say of course easy to say what, doable or not, ppl never bother to consider. The planning stage is chin chai anyhow. During a meeting, somebody say something, then someone else say something different. There is no consensus at all. Everybody keep suggesting new things during a 'brainstorm'. Who can make the final decision? When can stop suggestion and do up REAL PROPOSAL? When can start? How to start? When it ends?

Guess what? The outcome will be that someone anyhow throw a line to the development team, "You all do liao, we can see liao then say."

SIMI IRRESPONSIBLE SAI IS THIS? DO LIAO THEN SAY???

Can I say I have a idea to buy a knife. What shall we do with it? Cut meat? Cut vegetable? Cut fruits? How about I stab you just to try and see the effect? What!?! You say suggest & say only ma. I cannot say say only meh? If we hurt somebody in the process cos we mishandle it, aiya never mind, somebody will settle it somehow. Money? Aiya just spend the bare minimum lor, what's so hard?

IT'S SO VERY FUCKING EASY TO JUST SAY RIGHT????

As I mentioned, with costs & manpower involved and with paying customers breathing down your neck, you can't just anyhow spend their money and will therefore be careful with your planning proposal to make sure you get their approval and impress your potential client at the pitch.

Over here, it seems like manpower is FOR FREE, therefore the upper level CAN EASILY ask you to produce things miraculously within a short timeframe. Want to change then suka suka happy happy change cos you know what? Manpower is free what! WHOEVER can do WHATEVER kind of job. No need specific skillsets or experience, everyone should just try to do everything possible. If it's not done well, then easy, change again lor since manpower is for free what!

The upper level DO NOT have to know the time & effort to change something during development is actually more work (double work or triple work in fact) than just following what has been FINAL APPROVED ON THE AGREEMENT/PROPOSAL. Oh wait, what proposal? There are no proposals here! Cos free organisations do not have to consider about costs cos ideas are free. Everything is based on 'saying out/suggesting' only. One person say something = one option, 10 ppl say something = 10 options to work on. AFTER WHICH, it will take ages for everyone to agree & disagree on something.

Ppl here would rather make multiple changes during development stage than getting it right during planning stage. Why, you ask? I don't fucking get it too, seriously.

WHY is it always the designers stalling projects? Why do YOU think projects get stalled/delayed? Is it REALLY cos designers are slow? How do you define if a designer is slow? Cos he/she haven't come up with something? If a designer show you 3 choices, do you REALLY think that's the 3 choice that's ONLY worked out? Does it occur that there might be 4, 5, 6, 7 creations or ideas that are spoilt or thrown away that's not shown?

You SERIOUSLY think it's the designer's fault that ppl/clients just can't make up their fucking minds?

Don't give me the "I'll know it when I see it". When money is involved YOU CONFIRM CAN SEE IT! Precisely there's no costs of manpower involves, we are 'free labours' & 'sai kang warriors' to be moved around freely anyhow. Doesn't that equates to become such that IT'S OK for you to TAKE YOUR FUCKING TIME TO RUSH US cos all we are are just low-level human paintbrush who JUST SO HAPPEN to know Photoshop.

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And then ppl like my parents or some friends ask me what EXACTLY do I do? I only always reply, "My dept supports the school's teaching & learning tools. Technical Support stuff la."

Generally, that is correct. In any kind of organisation's 'support', ppl will expect some sort of technical help/problem they're facing, therefore they'd approach our dept.

If I have to be precise, my colleagues & I are actually all 'technologists' of some sort. All of us are doing 'technical support / customer service / PR'. AT THE SAME TIME, we're also some kind of research / consultant / advisor / strategist / planner / coordinator. Since all of our job scopes are seriously not well-defined as we're expected to do everything. What do you call someone who does everything? Bao ga liao or bao shan bao hai ARE General Workers right? What sort of special skillset do you expect a General Worker to have?

General Workers are supposed to gao dim everything right? Does it make sense for Jack of all trades to be good at every trade?

If someone can speak 10 languages, do you REALISTICALLY THINK that this person is able to use 10 language on a daily basis? What's the use of knowing 9 other languages other than English when everyone you know ONLY speaks English and not the other language you know?

If someone is able to play 10 instruments, do you really expect them to be equally good in every instrument? DO YOU? Would you STILL encourage him/her to pick up a 11th instrument? Would you believe that KNOWING how to play all 10 instruments equates to REMEMBERING how to play it if you hadn't used/touched it for a period of time?

Ok change way of putting. Let's say you do not have music background but you would like to learn a new instrument. After a year, you feel that you're not making any significant improvement/progress and that you're actually struggling to practice & get it right, but you geh kiang also picked up 2 other instruments at the same time. You realised actually you can't really cope, you request to just focus on one single instrument but your parents(or someone authoritative above you) feel it's good to pick up as many as possible. End up, you realised you didn't do well for the exams of the 3 instruments. If you're not good at something, does that mean you suck at it? Let's say, if you take 10 subjects at schools and you don't score A1 for all the subjects, does it mean you suck at these subjects?

Just replace the languages, instruments & subjects with skills, tasks & projects and you get the idea?

Rarely do projects here consider design as one of the important aspects. A lot of the project have been pre-decided and usually the design aspect is the last. To them it's only considered as 'low level' and not so important, hence it will be last in the pipeline. It doesn't help that most educated-professionals here are a bunch of indecisive, fickle-minded ppl.

You tell me contradicting or not?? Things are usually ALREADY decided WITHOUT the presence of a designer, then since a designer isn't part of the whole project meeting to know what's going on from the start, then throw in some 'simple' requirement for designers to visualize, what sort of masterpiece are they expecting? Then, when designers come up with something, it ALWAYS results in either endless changes due to misconception, miscommunication or or being labelled as 'slow' or the one stalling project. You think it's not important that's why you put at the last but then when the last component cannot be completed in time, you blame the person whom you thought wasn't important enough to be included in all the meetings to do the job?

WOW! BRILLIANT!!!

Part of design is Copywriting that are usually, typically supplied by clients. It's advisable for them to have their own internal meeting/discussion and thereafter produce a FINAL COPYWRITE which they'd like to include in the website or printed brochure etc. But what happens to 'free labours'? Every hour I'd get comments from different ppl giving me different instructions. What is this? We too free, nothing else to do, everyday, every hour STANDBY to make changes after every changes. VERY FUN RIGHT?

So if a cook/chef produce a dish that appeals to the different tastes of different patrons, then how? Too salty, too many vegetable, more meat, more sauce, less garlic etc. What's the typical reaction of the cook/chef?

NB! WANT EAT EAT LA! DON'T WANT EAT THEN ORDER SOMETHING ELSE LA! You expect lim beh to cook how many times to fit all of your taste? INGREDIENTS FREE ONE AH? No need gas, no need oil? Ownself will fry on its own, is it? NNB!

Yes it may sound exaggerating but in reality, it's not too far off from the above.

So we're expected to expand other areas, learn more things? Just designing layout is considered low level?!? This is what designers do, isn't it! What do you expect a sweeper to do other than sweeping and making sure the areas are clean? Will you ask a sweeper to babysit your child? You don't go to a fishmonger and ask him if he sells fruits or vegetable right? You don't go to a noodle stall and order a western food what! Bread Talk sells bread, it doesn't sell Chinese food or apparel! You see a dentist when your tooth hurt, not a chiropractor!

THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT FUCKING LEADERSHIP'S BELIEF OF ANYTHING & EVERYTHING CAN BE DONE AS LONG AS WILLING TO LEARN!

I don't believe the crap that leadership workshop train ppl to believe that EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE (don't give me the crap about Adidas tagline of Nothing Is Impossible). I know as long as you set your direction, if cannot be done, find experts. If dunno, ask someone for help and get it done. If no one can do, find other options.

Like that then FROM THE START should already get the experts liao what! You asked amateurs to do, takes longer and end products sucks. YOU WANT MEH??

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I think the heirachy here is hopeless. HOPELESS.

Ppl who has worked here for 10 years over have already adopt their way of working and not really open to 'changes'. Maybe they think they're older and knows BEST cos they're older than us and we are just a bunch of ignorant young ppl to them. Nobody trust our expertise!

See? Does being bao ga liao work/help? Our 'clients' aren't even impressed what we can do/produce, why would they engage our service? But then again, I see the quality of the projects coming... all templates, banners, stuff... How are all these portfolio going to convince our clients? Please lor.

The daily struggle here I'm facing is that everybody just want to do their own things with THEIR own ways. How to get things done like that?

"I don't care how you do it, just get it done." I'm sure your hear these words often from the upper level ppl. Everyone will be fighting for credits, own rights, don't care cos the upper level don't care, why should the lower level care? Then if lower ppl dunno how to do, then gotta ownself research, ownself learn, ownself settle. Those who don't care about credits, will just zo bo cos they dunno cos they really don't care either. Is this not a vicious cycle??

We're always asked to improve things/areas out of our comfort zone but shouldn't we focus more on our strength and strive to excel at it? Rather than making the person to go something he's not good at or requires a lot of learning. Very free again right?

There was viral Youtube video of a traveler (presumably a Westerner) who went to India and filmed down all the street life of people who are skilled experts in their field like being able to collect a fast food order extremely fast, the guy at the postage pasting stickers & stamping on paper in a fast speed, the person making naan who was able to throw the dough accurately without looking at his partner to toast, an elderly uncle who was able to make teh tarik in the most impressive 'bartender' ways he could.

How do you know you're good at something? How do you know they don't enjoy it even though they'd been doing the same thing for years? Do you think they should learn to do something other than what they're good at? Or just continue at what they're already good at?

How did those ppl acquire these skills? By doing it everyday for many years right? But guess what, in an educational institute where I am now, that is considered stagnant, mundane & boring.

To the person good at doing what he/she does, will you think or him that's considered boring??? HE LOVES IT THAT IS WHY HE IS DOING IT EVERYDAY COS HE FUCKING LIKES DOING WHAT HE'S DOING WHAT!!!!! Is there anything wrong with it??? To you, cos that person is doing things that you're not able to relate, OF COS you will think in YOUR shoes that, "how come that person is able to do boring stuff everyday ah?" You will use YOUR standard for YOUR life and JUDGE that person.

Hello? It's not like we will someday become an educator or a lecturer like what you're doing RIGHT NOW.

Everybody would, of course, hope to have the chance to do something they're good at and ultimately be appreciated for. If you're tasked to do something you're not really confident, yes bo bian need to do it, but you will do it well meh? Sure, everybody want to complete tasked/projects well but if outside of expertise also can, yes, go and learn JUST to make sure things can be done. But end up the outcome of projects are not up to standard then come and kao beh, got use?

If it's like what they claim to try to encourage everyone to "explore other areas and learn as many skills as possible", then if make blunder/mistakes how? Somebody has to answer it, isn't it? Why would you still want to mian qiang even if the person truthfully say he/she hasn't done it before but 'willing to try'?

Then some more SIBEI SIBEI JIAN thing is during appraisal, we are judged/appraised on THOSE blunders/mistakes we did while 'attempting to try NEW things'.

Now tell me, WHICH IDIOT would want to try new things again, knowing that they will be appraised that way?

Then end up everybody kiasi and don't dare to step out/up to try new things, everybody always will use the safest approach of "Aiya, simple one can already" so the quality of projects are just seriously as shitty as it gets.

I don't understand. Usually in workplace, there is little room for mistake, so OBVIOUSLY is to get someone with experience right? This is to ensure efficiency. You let someone with the right/appropriate experience do better than you find a newbie who has no clue what's going on, what's to do and you gotta spend time to train them on SKILLS. But ppl usually associate designers as human paintbrush to shift things left, right, make it bigger, smaller and hence ppl think designers jobs doesn't require brains as it's 'low/junior level'.

ARGGHHHH!!!!

I CAN & definitely able to learn new things if it's required. Just that I feel it's a bit pointless & useless for me to pick up those things which I can't carry forward to elsewhere or anywhere. It's not like I want to find niche to compete with other talented designers out there, why would I care? I only care about my own personal/professional development what! And ppl usually get that from job satisfaction....

Now that I'm hitting 30, on & off I'd think about ppl who realised/found out what they like to do and kept one doing since their teenage years. They would already have been expert of even veteran at what they're doing since then. But I simi sai achievement until now also don't have. Just thinking about that makes me =\

There's of course nothing wrong with expanding my scope but not everything is useful for me what! If I find that it's not useful/helpful to me, of cos I feel buay song doing la even though ppl think it's small thing only what! To them, It's ok one what!

See?! Ppl always use their own standard to measure what's easy to them on others. I say do 180 degree split is easy, can you do it? I'm a left-hander and if I tell ppl writing with left-hand SUPER EASY ONE WHAT, why you cannot?

ARGGHHHH!!!!

I probably need to go some mountain to seek enlightenment someday cos I hate that my peace is always getting disrupted. Orgh~ Jjin jja~